This little guiding light of mine/ I’m going to let it
shine/let it shine/all the time/ let it shine!
That’s my version of an ‘akash
prodeep’. This is a song which I learnt in school and yes I learnt it ‘by
heart’. And then I forgot all about it. I sang it again the day Ma put up an ‘Akash prodeep’ in the month of Kartik
after Thammi passed away.
Thammi/Thamtham/Thamburi…these were all the names that I
used to call my paternal grandmother. We lost her in 2002 to abdominal cancer.
And that was the year I got through campus interview. She had promised me that
she would accompany me wherever I went for my posting. Well when my place of
posting was announced she was up there in the sky and yes she did live up to
her word of following me around. That year Ma decided to put up an ‘Akash prodeep’ for my paternal
grandparents. ‘Now that they both are up there let’s light a light for them’ is
what Ma had said while putting it up.
Baba, who never believed in these customs refused to be a
party to it. We got a bamboo stick (about my height- 151cm), stuck a zero watt
bulb on the top and connected the wire to the nearest plug point. Our ‘akash prodeep’ was ready. We set this up
on our sprawling terrace at our Burdwan house. Our everyday evening ritual was
switching it on. The warm glow of the lamp in the terrace on those wintry
Kartik nights was quite calming. Many a night I and my sister would creep up
the stairs wishing that ‘Thammi’ would see the light and come down for an
earthly visit. That feeling of warmth still creeps into my heart whenever I
think of an ‘akash prodeep’.
It was one of those nights when we were planning to creep up
the stairs that I heard the terrace door make a creaking sound. Surprised as there
was nobody around we stealthily moved up the stairs. I saw a shadow. Scared and
shivering, my little sister crouched below the lowermost rung while I mustered
enough courage to climb up. I thought ‘Thammi
has finally decided to pay us a visit’ and mounted up the stairs. Wide open
and lit by the Purnima the terrace
was clear except for a silhouette standing next to the ‘akash prodeep’. Quite tall for Thammi…
or maybe after death my little Thammi who
was hardly four feet has gained some height.
Well well well, who was it standing next to my ‘guiding
light’? None but my father who had refused to help us with the prodeep and who refused to believe in
these stories. I found him gazing longingly at the prodeep possibly echoing the same sentiments that we had!
Last year I lost my maternal grandfather who was a ‘father
figure’ to me. This year while setting up the prodeep I could feel a connection
with Thammi and Dadu.
My Akash prodeep is very dear to me. While penning down this
post I can see it standing tall and stately like a guardian angel in my terrace
promising to protect me against all odds and evil.
I know of many people who ridicule this custom and laugh at
people like me. But this is what I believe in. It has nothing to do with
superstition. Putting up an akash prodeep is like offering a Puja/garland to
one’s ancestor. If we can perform an elaborate shradh ceremony in the memory of the deceased and spend thousands
on feeding people then what harm does it do in lighting an akash prodeep for a month?
I would like to end this post with another favorite song of mine.
Aakash prodeep
jo-le, duur er taarar paane cheye-e
Aa-mar noyon duuti shudhui-i toma-re cha-he
Bethar badol-e jay che-ey
Aa-mar noyon duuti shudhui-i toma-re cha-he
Bethar badol-e jay che-ey
Boye chole
andhi-ar raatri
Aami choli dishahin j-aatri
Duur ajanar paar-e ,o-kul ashar khey-a peeye (okul or akul same)
Aamar noyon d-uuti shudhui-i toma-re cha-he
Bethar badol e jay che-ey
Aami choli dishahin j-aatri
Duur ajanar paar-e ,o-kul ashar khey-a peeye (okul or akul same)
Aamar noyon d-uuti shudhui-i toma-re cha-he
Bethar badol e jay che-ey
Koto kaal aar
koto kaal
Ei poth chola oo-go cholbe (poth or path same)
Koto raatri ar hiya-aa (the word ’ar’is almost silent here. Hidden in ratri)
Akash prodeep hoye j-olbe
Ei poth chola oo-go cholbe (poth or path same)
Koto raatri ar hiya-aa (the word ’ar’is almost silent here. Hidden in ratri)
Akash prodeep hoye j-olbe
Kono raat-e mon-e
ki go porbe (o like kora kagoz, r=d in Hindi)
Betha hoye ankhi jol jhorbe
B-atash akuul ho-be tomar nish-ash tu-ku p-eye
Aamar noyon duuti shudhui-i toma-re cha-he
Bethar badol-e jay che-ey
Betha hoye ankhi jol jhorbe
B-atash akuul ho-be tomar nish-ash tu-ku p-eye
Aamar noyon duuti shudhui-i toma-re cha-he
Bethar badol-e jay che-ey
Original Singer: Lata Mangeshkar, Lyrics- Pabitra Mitra, Music-
Satinath Mukherjee